"of all the things
i could've broken
How to love a warrior.She isn't a girl you can mess with. Her rubber band heart strikes back with twice the hurt you are capable of feeling. Her ivory rib cage will protect her and break every protruding knuckle in your fist if you try to reach her when she doesn't want you to. She can stand alone at the end of the world. Don't think she is yours to tame.
She can save herself.
She won’t need you to wait on her, hand and foot. She won’t need you to save her from the monsters underneath her bed. She slayed them when she was seven. She will carve the remains of your closet skeletons out of your chest where they learnt to hide and she'll frame them on your bedroom wall as a constant reminder of the time she was your knight in shining armor.
She won’t need you. But you'll need her. And she'll want you to.
She'll want you to need her the way she will learn to need you. With every breath in her lungs, she will breathe you in. She will batter your body's tin roof with sarcasm, heavy as hail
Butterflies.You said, “Yellow brick roads never led home.” For a long while, I chose to believe they didn’t. For a long while, I let your definitions define me so even if just for a while, I could have meaning. You said, ‘You can’t paint roses red, that’s not how color works,’ but I hadn’t seen much color as a child so I let you give me your monochromatic sight. You said, ‘Rabbits weren’t meant for waistcoats,’ so I let him go, hoping. Hoping, he wouldn’t be late.
You said, today could start with Once-upon-a-time but Ever-Afters had no guarantees. You said you could be the prince but I had to be Cinderella in shard shoes. You said dwarves had standards.
You said the Magic Mirror had never heard of me. You said I couldn’t name the colors of the wind. You said the ‘Dragons be here,’ on optimistic maps was wrong. You said I had no place in fairytales because they were lies with paperback wings.
Let me tell you a
Untitled.sing to me
in your ocean tide voice.
crash into me. hurtle your stones
and sea shells
against my skin and make me sway.
hold on to me
with your straying grasp. collide
your runaway train into mine.
don't end the sentence of my existence
with a question mark.
sleep with me.
give me space-time-synesthesia
so i can see the clock encircle me,
the calender sheets.
so i can recall what you have to do last tuesday
and did tomorrow.
when i see you
i really see you
walk with me.
slip your twitching fingers into the spaces
between mine. we may not fit 'perfect'
but we fit 'all right.'
dance for me.
bend your body in
skeletal origami. take me by the hand
and fold me a paper crane.
peel me away, layer after layer
till i am too light to fly,
blow in between my folds and set me
your thunderclouds and make me
sway. sway, to the breeze of your
starry night meadow. silence your oceans
and still flinch at the deafening roar.
hush my hurricanes, hush.
Addictionyou are forever
and i am dying. you
are a book that starts
with no beginning. the star
that was never high enough
to fall. the dream never lucid enough
to hold. you are
the sticks and stones
that could've broken my bones
but took me home
you are forever
and i am dying. you
are the sky that
could've fallen. the page
that could've been turned.
the flame never bright enough
to be put out.
you are the broken watch
ticking, clicking, wishing
for the end of thinking
next to nothing.
you are forever
and i am dying. you
are the rope around my neck
the death of me.
with every breath in me
i call for you
wondering if you
the whole truth.
you are forever
and i am dying
to touch you
to love you
to wait for the end of time to be with you.
i can spend the rest of my life with you
but you can't spend the rest of yours with me.
i want to be the beginning of your book
the height of your star
the strength of your dreams.
i'm ripping open my hearts' bloody seams.
you are f
Can't phrase a sentence right.i have always wanted to write. writing, it’s, it’s one of those things that strips you of race, gender and culture and the only thing you’re judged on is the way that your words glide through the air, planting a kiss on every corner of the room when you say them. writing is one of those things that can be so moving when said that even the crevices in cracking plaster walls smile and whisper, “hey, that was beautiful.”
writing, it just kind of asks you to lend it your heart so it can paint words that are true and as soaked in dreams and hope as your blood is. it isn’t just words on a page, no, it is so much more. it’s lyrical origami, it’s poetry that makes diamonds shrivel in distaste as they wait to reach that state of perfection, it's a song that can be read in soundless space and still be heard with music in the background. it’s line after line of nothing but a collection of letters that don’t deserve to be called words sim
Just for a heartbeat.“i will never be the hero. don’t you understand that? i will never wear a cape and fly around town, saving people. i will never get a medal from the mayor of wherever. i will never be a hero. i can’t fly or shoot beams out of my eyes. i’m not even an 'average' hero that walks to work. i’m nobody. i’m a freak and everybody knows it. i’m a freak with fake broken pieces in me because i’m so pathetic i can’t even make my self up out of anything but lies. i’m a freak and no freak was ever a 'hero'. i’m a bloody lighthouse and i can’t just become a wave crashing at the shoreline. i just can't disappear. i’m not a hero. i’ll trip over my cape and kill someone. if that’s heroism then i’m on top of the world but, by definition, that doesn’t count. i’m a screw-up that will never do things right. i’m a screwed-up freak and that doesn't count... i don't coun
As long as anywhere was far enough.instead of a prison cell, he thought of it like a bird cage. it was his bird cage. we were imprisoned in three concrete walls that laughed at us and one lined with iron bars for the others to join in until we could bear no more mockery for the teenage sins we committed. while the rest of us screamed and cursed, crying out loud for the endless laughter to stop, he did nothing. he never did anything but twist metaphors and similes into ribbons he wrapped in every heartbeat and though the bitter hated it, i couldn’t help but find it his way of coping because he saw himself as a bird. a bird with the will to fly far away from the cage it was held captive in because we all saw this world as a chessboard or a game of scales but he wanted to believe there was something more, that there was something after the king had fallen to a pawn. he wanted to believe this world was something he could fly away from. that it was something that could wait for him and slow down when the time was
We were eternal.The body attacked itself. The mind forgot things. The eyes became sightless and limbs became immobile. The heart stopped beating. The blood stopped flowing. The fingers began sh-sh-shaking. The head became weightless. The hair weakened and fell. The bones began weakening and made us fall. The tongue refused to paint words in the air. The breath froze over. The heart stopped beating. The skin receded into a shrivel. The body bent over and hid in shame. The lungs stopped breathing. The heart stopped. The blood dried up. The bones stood strong but the flesh was lost. The corpse decayed. The life was gone.
But we were eternal. But we were forever. We were matter into energy. We could not be destroyed. We could not be created. We were there. We weren't everlasting. We weren't forever. But we were eternal. But we were eternal. We were supposed to be eternal.
On lockdown“Karah. My name is Karah. I am not Alice. I am Karah. I am Karah, Karah, Alice doesn’t exist.”
In those few seconds, Alice could let herself slip into a blanket of quiet. For some time, she wasn’t Alice anymore. She wasn’t weak or alone. She wasn’t hurt or broken. She wasn’t a thousand pieces of shattered glass lying on the floor trying to mend itself to form the perfect mirror it had once been. If only for a moment, she was whole. She wasn’t a runaway train. If only for a moment, she was on the right track, zooming at high speeds, safely, not colliding, not crashing. She was beautiful. Her scarred skin shed and now, she was beautiful. Her skin was painted in a hundred colors and her eyes shone as if star dust had found safe haven among her tears. She felt for the scar beneath her eyes and found nothing. She wasn’t Alice anymore. She was Karah. She was whole. She was complete. It had been so long since she had last felt so perfectly
I Find MyselfI find myself in my bedroom walls,
Silent and ever watchful.
I find myself in the worn living room floors,
Beaten down until used to it.
I find myself underneath my bed,
Understanding that I am my own monster.
I find myself looking at the door,
Wondering when it will open.
I find myself peeping through the window,
But night leaves nothing in my sight.
I find myself in old conversations,
My heart finally still.
I find myself stamped into black words,
Wishing for white paint.
I find myself in moonlight,
And beg for the sun.
I find myself in a dream,
After all of this nightmare.
I find myself crying,
Because you are still there.
I find myself hoping that this,
This is the last time.
I find myself turning from you,
There is no use lying.
I find myself smiling,
I find myself a lost cause,
I always find myself
Waiting for you.
The Girl Who Was Afraid To BeShe speaks to me fondly
of passions and talents,
of guitars and stars,
with such breathless intensity
then stops short and
for speaking at all.
All because somewhere in her life,
someone she loved broke her heart
her beautiful words
and telling her to
keep it down,
People aren’t born sad.
We make them that way.
Rising from the ashesI sank down
All the way to the bottom
And I thought
I'd never rise again
But I've found my way
I relied on great friends
I fought hard
And even if I still have
A long way to go
I'll keep trying
I will survive
School is endingGood bye, dear school,
Good bye, and thank you
For all knowledges you gave
Good bye, dear school yard,
Good bye, and remember -
Our memories will stay with you
Good bye, dear teachers,
Good bye, and please -
Keep pieces of our souls
In your hands.
Bring our past,
Bring our childhood
And share with sucessors
There was a time
when he had long, curly hair
to rival that of any
his father called him
"My little Princess"
but he was always a
Prince, and couldn't see
why his Mother did not
There were two times
where he went to a church
once for a Christmas service and
he couldn't understand how
"God is love," when he
had been cursed with a body
not his own -
another a few years later
when his outside
matched his inside,
but they turned him away
still claiming that
"God is love," and he
still couldn't understand
how that was possible.
There were three times
when other boys at school
followed him home cursing
every bone in his body,
calling him names, there
was one with blue eyes
who had a knife and left him
and the nurses in hospital
called him the wrong name -
at night he cried bitterly
about the world's ignorance.
There were four times
when he wondered if there
was a special heaven
for boys like him and,
hoping there was,
I couldn't see the consequences-
As I tried to trust my heart
I just couldn't resist-
The blind love that ceased my wars
Helping me let go of the struggles-
That I foolishly held in my hands
I freed the thoughts that quarreled-
Tears fell in order for me to stand
Truth can be the worst enemy
Lies can be the strongest ally
Harmony isn't immune to tragedy
Because you made a myth out of your apparent humanity
Mistakes can never be renamed! / Scars can never be erased!
Compassion is used as bait! / Two sides to every face!
A piece of peace is caged! / Watch the bridge burn away!
I'll desecrate the meaning of “passion”
You redefined my every moral
There will be no hesitation
I won't need anyone -anymore-
I ignored the risks-
Of handing over my hope
Killed by a kiss-
Turning my world to stone
I believed in your deceit-
And I fell too hard
My mind endlessly screams-
It Was Never You...It really wasn't...
And I know that I can twist this truth as much as I want...
Whenever I'm sober, when I know I can put up that fake plastic smile;
Just a few formal words that burn like acid from a liar's lips!
"Differences in personality, a divergence in ideals..."
Please, fucking, SPARE ME!
Because when I look in this mirror, I know.
When I see myself looking back at me, I know.
Right here, right in front of my own blackened self;
Those eyes that both reflect and stare into my dingy soul.
I was the problem.
I was the instigator.
I was the perpetrator.
And when I had broken every last bit of her,
I was the one, who let it all fall to pieces.
So please, you don't have to feel sorry for me,
I am a bastard and I've got a very special place in hell waiting for me...
- Word of Chen, Darkest Hour, 16th February 2015
The Bright Side of DyslexiaI was born with auditory dyslexia.
I once heard of someone who wrote, directed, and coastguard in their own movie.
I knew what the right word was, but it still got me thinking:
About the invigorating music of waves crashing against my vessel,
The challenge of serving to the best of my skills,
The pride of keeping the shores of my homeland safe.
That was how I found my career,
And it's been just as rewarding as I had hoped.
An episode of CSI mentioned literature marks on the vic's neck,
Which inspired a fulfilling side project of poetry.
In a later CSI, taunts were exchanged:
"I'm the king of the jingle here! You don't stand a chants!"
"That's what you think! This isn't my first radio!"
(It wasn't a very well-written episode.)
Anyway, with that I tried adding tunes to my rhymes.
The result was better than I expected;
A local morning show even played one of my works on the radio!
My girlfriend told me she needed a shoulder to crayon.
This inspired me to